Schedule.

Good golly, what a week it has been! Here's my week in a nutshell and incomplete sentences.

Monday:

8am - Physiology with Dr. LaCelle. Only...he didn't show up on Monday. His electricity went out overnight, so he got up an hour late.

9am - Recreational Games. Since two of my dear friends are in class with me, it's more of a time to relax and laugh.

10am - Back to the dorm to shower and make myself look presentable. Let's face it, waking up at 7:30 for an 8 o'clock class doesn't leave time to do much other than brush teeth, throw on a clean shirt, and grab coffee.

11am - Chapel. New scanner thingies were used for the first time. President Martin told us the history of RWC and even managed to sneak in a "scholarship, service, spiritual formation" plug.

12pm - Intro to Music. Great class, even though I briefly fell asleep the first day. Whoopsies.

1pm - Biochem lab with Dr. Roll. RT-PCR. Though all of us have done it at some point, it still required about 45 minutes of explanation.

Tuesday:

8am - Biochem...enough said.

9:25am - Introduce myself to the BIO 101 class. Tell them their options for getting help from me, collect surveys, and leave.

12:15pm - Personal Economics. Let's put it this way: we have no tests, no quizzes, and no final.

1:40pm - Physiology lab. Dr. LaCelle showed up 10 minutes late WITHOUT a Diet Coke.

7pm - Intro to the Health Professions. One word: FRESHMEN.

8pm - Foot meeting. God has some good stuff in store for this year!

Wednesday:

8am - Physiology. Dr. LaCelle came in 10 minutes late with a Mountain Dew instead of a Diet Coke (because the machine spat out the wrong one). Homeostasis.

9am - Recreational Games. Laughter, dice, scribbling down words and letters as quickly as possible.

10am - Back to the dorm to shower.

11am - Skipped Convocation. Some librarian was speaking. Freshmen flocked.

12pm - Intro to Music. Played with rhythm and time signatures. Reminds me of my first year or so of piano lessons way back in the day.

1pm - Biochem lab. Dr. Roll did all the work while we stood around and watched. All I did was pipette a total of 4 microliters of my DNA solution into 2 wells. RT-PCR fail.

5:30pm - North Campus BBQ! Circled up with some housemates.

8pm - Tie-dyed with the whole house! Our shirts look fantastic. Marlise accidentally bought kids' size M shirts, so we had some good laughs after I attempted to stretch one out.

Thursday:

8am - Biochem. Not gonna lie, I dozed quite a bit. I didn't wake up in time for my coffee. Rawr.

9:25am - Read for Personal Ec.

12:15pm - Personal Ec. Worked with Linny to do our in-class homework. What an oxymoron.

1:30pm - Biochem homework. If only I could understand the whole buffer thing.

7:30pm - Leading a class meeting. I'd like to have 10 people there. Ha! We'll see how it goes.

Who knows what's in store for tomorrow! My only class is Physiology at 8am, so hopefully I'll get a bunch of homework done so I can enjoy some free time this weekend. A doctor's appointment at 2:15, a quick trip to Walmart to get some much-needed snack food, tutor training, and a cookout at JT and Becka's will likely consume the rest of my afternoon. Oh, college. Someday I'll miss you.

Okay.

Sometimes, it's okay to be scared.
It's okay to have no idea where life is taking you. I woke up numerous times throughout the night last night--thinking, hoping, dreaming--freaking out. The ironic thing is that I know where I'm going. Okay, not exactly, but I love what I'm studying and I love the career path that I'm heading towards. I have best friends and close friends and acquaintances and everything in between. My relationship with Jesus Christ is growing deeper each day as I'm challenged to live a life of purity and integrity.
Life is good.
So why be scared? Because life is constantly changing. The ebbs and flows of life keep me on my toes, keep me thinking, keep me desiring more, keep me challenged, keep me questioning, keep me hoping and praying and loving and talking and dreaming. They keep me in a world of the unknown, despite plans and goals and dreams.
But the ebbs and flows of life are ordained by God, and He has it all under control. And that, dear friends, is what is so scary. I am not in control of my life. Of course, I make numerous decisions each day, for better or for worse. However, ultimately, I'm only second in command. And while that scares me like nothing else in this world, it's okay. God has everything under control.
So even though I'm a bit freaked about starting my junior year of college and applying to grad school and passing biochem and keeping up with friends and living with integrity...it's okay.


One thing I've learned recently is that more than anything else, God just wants me to trust Him. He sees the big picture, and He knows what I'm feeling even when I cannot explain it to myself. He is worshiped and honored when He is allowed to move as He wants to within my life. A life that is wholly surrendered is a life full of passionate worship to its Creator.

God is more deserving of my worship than anyone else in the universe. The sacrifices that He made as Father and Jesus made as Son simply exceeds what I can comprehend. I suppose that's beauty of grace. But anyway.

Trusting God to be my strength, my joy, my life always means that things come out the right way in the end, even if the right way isn't my way. When He is allowed to work where He belongs (in the middle of it all, leading the way), I am bringing Him glory. If God is worshiped and loved and adored when I completely lose control and let Him live through me, then being scared is okay.